SnatchFace: I stumbled into the bathroom this morning after being up half the night with stomach pain and grabbed the wrong tube out of the cabinet in my stupor. I brushed for a half minute with Anusol HC when it slowly seeped into my addled brain that somethign was not quite right. I have been barfing ever since. Am I dying? 
Rouge: Perhaps you should change your name to Assface. 
Blazert40: I'll give you 32 mins to live.
vi-edit: Going by your screenname, at least it wasn't Vagisil.